F A T E
What is FATE? The Collins English Mini Dictionary defines it as "(1) power supposed to predetermine events, (2) inevitable fortune that befalls a person or thing." When I asked a friend of mine what fate was, he replied - "God's plan." I guess I'm more inclined to agree with this definition more than anything else.
Fate, for me, is God's plan...But I believe that everyone's life is like a story with many paths. Most of you will remember reading those books where you make choices for the characters and you end up with lots of different plots as you make different choices. Well, that's what I believe life and fate to be like. God has mapped out your life for you, but he has mapped out many paths...and each choice you make has the ability to take you from one path to another. In this way, we have free will and can make our own choices, but we are also free to make mistakes. Another thing I believe about fate is that everything happens for a reason. I guess I believe that this is God's way of guiding us and teaching us lessons. If you make a mistake, there is a good reason for the consequence that follows, and so on. Sometimes, God will make things happen in your life to bring you back to Him, or to lead you somewhere or to something.
The next question about the role that fate plays in life is - can you change your fate? Some people believe that if you were born poor, then you'll always be poor; if you were born unlucky then you'll always be unlucky; if you were born stupid, then you'll always be stupid; and if you were born never to be rich, then you'll never be rich no matter how hard you work. Of course, I shouldn't criticise other people's beliefs, but if you look around you, you'll see that this is really not the case. Fate may play a part in life, but it does not govern your life. Fate is what you make it to be...Look at all the people who thought they were failures but became successes - people like Walt Disney, Charles Shultz, and Dave Pelzer just to name a few. If you believe that you can be what you want to be, strive hard to achieve that, and make the right choices, then your fate will be what you want it to be. I agree with what George Bernard Shaw said: "People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can't find them, make them."
And finally, what about the role fate plays in relationships? Yes, fate has the ability to bring two people together...Why else would there be a saying "meant to be"? But, what if you're already in a relationship and you got to know someone else while you were in the relationship? Would you look at it as fate, another opportunity for you, take it to mean something and take an interest in them? Or would you look at is as just someone else who is just passing by in your life and just another someone who you have simply brushed shoulders with? I guess my belief here is that commitment takes precedence over what you might think is fate. Fate brought you and the person you are committed to together...But it is up to you to make it work and make it last. Think about how many lives, relationships and families have been destroyed because of people's misconceptions of where fate is leading them, especially when it comes to relationships.
So what really is FATE? Destiny? Yes. A written plan for you? Yes. But it is a written plan with different roads. Is fate something that governs you, your life and your relationships? No. Fate is controlled by you, and the choices you make. As Jack Welch once said: "Control your destiny...Or someone else will."
