One step at a time – when things go wrong
By: Gilainne Sytingco
Have you ever been in a situation where everything just seems to be going wrong? Where your life just seems to be falling apart, and you can’t seem to do anything to stop it? One thing I’ve truly learnt this year is that life is difficult. However, no matter how hard things get, we should always try to look at the brighter side of things. Here are three things I think about when I am put into a difficult situation.
Limitations
Humans are limited creatures with limited capabilities and capacities. There’s only so much we can do and take…and this is most clearly seen when we are put into difficult situations. However, it is only when faced with obstacles that we can see where we’re at, and strive to improve ourselves. Hence, try to look at difficult situations as challenges and a chance for self-improvement.
Growth
Difficult situations shape us into who we are and enable us to grow. With every mistake and encounter we experience, we learn different life lessons. Most of the time, the only way we’ll learn is through experience. The way I try to look at it is that difficult situations are just one of the classes in the school of life.
Impact
Through experiencing life’s blows, we are better able to relate to others and help them. We are able to understand and listen to others better, and we are able to offer better advice and suggestions. Thus, difficult situations help us make an impact in other peoples’ lives…no matter how big or small.
Finding yourself in a difficult situation is hard…But sometimes, getting out of it is even harder. When the obstacles and challenges just keep piling on, we start to feel as if we’re drowning and can’t get out. It’s like quicksand…you’re being sucked into a place where you don’t want to be in. One thing I’ve learnt is to take things one step at a time. Pray and trust in the Lord to guide you through it. God will not put you into a situation which you cannot handle. Although “God does not promise a life free of storms, he does promise to keep his watchful eyes over us as we go through them”.
Friday, December 30, 2005
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
F O C U S
By: Gilainne Sytingco
Often times we feel lost…as if our life has no direction. We don’t know where we’re heading. We have lost our grasp on the goals and dreams we once had. We have no aims in life. It’s as if we are stuck in a rut and we can’t get out. But, it’s during these times especially that we think about success - success in general, other people’s achievements, our own accomplishments and failures. We become cynical about life…but really, what we want is just that little bit of success. The question is…How to obtain such success. The answer is simple and can be encapsulated in one single, five-lettered word: F-O-C-U-S.
A synonym for FOCUS would be PAYING ATTENTION. But, is it really that simple? What do you have to pay attention to? The subject seems so vast, doesn’t it? You could pay attention to the way you eat, the way you dress, your finances, your home, your car, your job and any other number of things. The list is endless. So what does one pay attention to?
Believe me when I say that there is a process here. First, we must decide and choose what we want to achieve. Is it better grades? Becoming more sociable? Better fashion-sense? A better car? Excelling at sports? What ever it is, you must decide on the one thing you want to achieve. Now, why is it that we have to decide? Simple. If you don’t know what you want, and if your mind is confused and messed up, then you will never get what you want. Understandably, there are a countless number of things that we all want to achieve. But, it wouldn’t do us any good if we were to decide to want to achieve all of them at the same time, because your attention would be split up between a large number of choices. It would defeat the purpose of the matter at hand, which is to FOCUS.
This brings us directly onto the next step. FOCUS. Once you have decided what it is that you want, you need to focus and pay attention to it. It’s a concept based on common sense – if you pay attention and focus on a particular activity, then it will progress. On the other hand, if you neglect it, it will regress. Think of it as a plant. In order for a plant to flourish, you need to cultivate and tend to it. Otherwise, it will simply wither and die. This is a ‘tried and done’ practice that many of us know to be true. Just think of that subject or university paper that you slacked off in. What happened? Chances are, you didn’t do very well. Well, what about that one wherein you worked, focused and studied really hard for? What happened? You (most likely) did much better, if not very well.
Focusing on what you desire may not be enough. Sometimes, you also need to pay attention to who you spend time with. Are your friends people who act as an encouragement to you? Or are they people who pull you down? Are they people who have similar desires? Or are they people who push you to do the exact opposite? Who do you associate with? I’m not telling you to ignore and leave your old friends behind. All I’m saying is that it would be to your benefit if there were some positive influences in your life…Influences who will encourage you to advance to another level. Choosing who you associate with is a large part of self-cultivation.
Hence, how and where we move in life is largely dependent on the choices we make and the actions we take. Choose what you want. Work hard and focus on it. Then you’ll get what you want. Remember: we seal our fate by the choices we make.
By: Gilainne Sytingco
Often times we feel lost…as if our life has no direction. We don’t know where we’re heading. We have lost our grasp on the goals and dreams we once had. We have no aims in life. It’s as if we are stuck in a rut and we can’t get out. But, it’s during these times especially that we think about success - success in general, other people’s achievements, our own accomplishments and failures. We become cynical about life…but really, what we want is just that little bit of success. The question is…How to obtain such success. The answer is simple and can be encapsulated in one single, five-lettered word: F-O-C-U-S.
A synonym for FOCUS would be PAYING ATTENTION. But, is it really that simple? What do you have to pay attention to? The subject seems so vast, doesn’t it? You could pay attention to the way you eat, the way you dress, your finances, your home, your car, your job and any other number of things. The list is endless. So what does one pay attention to?
Believe me when I say that there is a process here. First, we must decide and choose what we want to achieve. Is it better grades? Becoming more sociable? Better fashion-sense? A better car? Excelling at sports? What ever it is, you must decide on the one thing you want to achieve. Now, why is it that we have to decide? Simple. If you don’t know what you want, and if your mind is confused and messed up, then you will never get what you want. Understandably, there are a countless number of things that we all want to achieve. But, it wouldn’t do us any good if we were to decide to want to achieve all of them at the same time, because your attention would be split up between a large number of choices. It would defeat the purpose of the matter at hand, which is to FOCUS.
This brings us directly onto the next step. FOCUS. Once you have decided what it is that you want, you need to focus and pay attention to it. It’s a concept based on common sense – if you pay attention and focus on a particular activity, then it will progress. On the other hand, if you neglect it, it will regress. Think of it as a plant. In order for a plant to flourish, you need to cultivate and tend to it. Otherwise, it will simply wither and die. This is a ‘tried and done’ practice that many of us know to be true. Just think of that subject or university paper that you slacked off in. What happened? Chances are, you didn’t do very well. Well, what about that one wherein you worked, focused and studied really hard for? What happened? You (most likely) did much better, if not very well.
Focusing on what you desire may not be enough. Sometimes, you also need to pay attention to who you spend time with. Are your friends people who act as an encouragement to you? Or are they people who pull you down? Are they people who have similar desires? Or are they people who push you to do the exact opposite? Who do you associate with? I’m not telling you to ignore and leave your old friends behind. All I’m saying is that it would be to your benefit if there were some positive influences in your life…Influences who will encourage you to advance to another level. Choosing who you associate with is a large part of self-cultivation.
Hence, how and where we move in life is largely dependent on the choices we make and the actions we take. Choose what you want. Work hard and focus on it. Then you’ll get what you want. Remember: we seal our fate by the choices we make.
Friday, January 21, 2005
L I F E ' S A B I T C H ?
BY: GILAINNE SYTINGCO
Life's a bitch, isn't it? A few years ago, our eyes were glued to the news as we watched footage of the World Trade Centre crashing down. Although horrified, we couldn't turn away. Threats of terrorism terrified us - to the point where a lot of us didn't want to travel. Bush's war on terrorism followed, as well as news of terrorists kidnapping foreign workers in Iraq. The beheadings of these workers became the 'talk of the town'.
2004 was a bad year for me. It was a year that begun and ended with a series of unfortunate events - car accidents, health problems, near-death experiences. So, when I went on a holiday overseas, I pretty much expected it to flow smoothly, with no worries or tragedies. Well, as they say, it's free to dream. As soon as we got to the Philippines, news of a devastating typhoon that traumatised the Quezon and Aurora provinces hit us; followed by the death, wake and funeral of popular actor and ex-Presidential candidate Fernando Poe Jr. During the Christmas season, we were struck by the Kristina Casimira ("KC") de Venecia tragedy. The sixteen-year-old was trapped inside her home when their Christmas lights caught fire. Thinking that she was out, KC's family and household staff rushed out of the house. It wasn't until she called her sister and screamed for help did they realised that she was still inside. But alas, it was too late. The firemen could not break through the iron grills and bullet-proof windows of her home and she perished. She was found dead four hours later, her body partially burned, lying face down in the bathtub of her brother's bathroom and wrapped in a wet blanket. Authorities say that she died slowly, from suffocation.
But perhaps the most hellish event of the year was the Indian Ocean tsunami that hit Indonesia, Thailand, Bangladesh, India, Sri Lanka, the Maldives, Malaysia, Myanmar, Seychelles and Africa (Kenya and Somalia). As of 6:46PM EST (2346 GMT) on January 19, 2005, CNN news reports estimate the total death toll at 212,000. Many speculate that this number will increase, based on the World Health Organization's fear of (a possible) plague due to water contamination caused by a large number of corpses unproperly handled. This global catastrophe was brought a little bit closer to home because of the death of nineteen-year-old Sharleen Tan, who made the headlines as the first Filipino victim who perished in Phuket. The de Venecia and Tan tragedies affected me more than the others because I have friends who knew either KC or Sharleen, or who was barkada (inner circle of friends/close group of friends) with them.
As if the events of the past few years and months haven't been enough already, Exit Mundi advocates state that more is yet to come. They prophecize that certain parts of the world will have to deal with a MEGATSUNAMI of "biblical proportions" and state that "The world is going to end. You don't even have to be a religious fundamentalist to see that's true". The Exit Mundi collect doomsday scenarios like how other people collect rare coins, stickers, bookmarks and figurines.
If Exit Mundi advocates are to be taken seriously, and the world really is going to end, have you ever thought about whether you are ready to die? Whether you'd go to heaven or hell? Whether you've lived your life to the max? The existence of heaven, hell, the after-life or reincarnation is largely a spiritual question. The religion you belong to will determine which one you believe in. However, no matter which one you think really exists, each 'destination' for the dead has certain criteria you must fulfill - whether it's being a good person or believing in a certain entity. I'm not going to be discussing these...You could probably write a thesis on this topic alone. Regardless of that, the real questions here are - have you fulfilled those criterias? Do you know where you're going to go? Are you ready?
The term "Live life to the max" has become a cliche over the years. But what does it really mean? Oftern we see this term as a slogan accompanying advertisements of people jumping off airplanes or bungee jumping with a can of softdrink in their hand. Is that what it really means? Probably not. Another way of saying "Live life to the max" is "Live life to the fullest". I've been taught that a "full live" is a life lived helping other people. Think Mother Teresa if you want. We see people who require our help all the time - from a friend who needs someone to listen, to a beggar on the street, to a child who has been orphaned due to tragic events. If we can touch the life of just one of these people - millions of whom exist all over the world - wouldn't that make such a big difference?
But helping others is just half of the story. Why not look towards yourself too? Are you one of those people who spend each day mucking around, doing nothing? I've been in that same situation myself, and let me tell you - you feel so empty at the end of the day. It's the same if you have no goals or dreams. You feel drained and aimless everyday - you're going nowhere and you don't know what you're doing. It's a horrible feeling! Personally, if I knew that I was about to die, I'd rather have a sense of fulfillment. A feeling of contentment, satisfaction and purpose within myself. A feeling that I've done some things, at least.
Life's a bitch, huh? We see and hear terrifying and horrifying things all the time. Apocalyptic prophecies aside, we don't know exactly when we're going to die and how. It could be fifty years from now, a month from now, tomorrow, tonight or even within the next ten minutes. Who knows? If I were you, I'd start getting prepared. You may not be around for much longer.